In case you were in a coma or hiding under a rock this whole past week, you might had missed the whole Letterman vs. Palin throwdown. If so, then here is the 4-1-1.

Letterman, made a few jabs at Palin’s recent visit to the Big Apple on his Late Show this past week in his opening monologue and in his Top Ten List: Top Ten Highlights of Sarah Palin’s Trip to New York City:

10. Visited New York landmarks she normally only sees from Alaska
9. Laughed at all the crazy-looking foreigners entering the U.N.
8. Made moose jerky on Rachael Ray
7. Keyed Tina Fey’s car
6. After a wink and a nod, ended up with a kilo of crack
5. Made coat out of New York City rat pelts
4. Sat in for Kelly Ripa. Regis couldn’t tell the difference.
3. Finally met one of those Jewish people Mel Gibson’s always talking about
2. Bought makeup from Bloomingdale’s to update her “slutty flight attendant” look
1. Especially enjoyed not appearing on Letterman

He also joked about Yankee’s star A-Rod (Alex Rodriguez) knocking up her daughter.

And even though most of the world was laughing, the Palin’s were not amused. At all. And they wrote this little response on their website:

“From Governor Sarah Palin: “Concerning Letterman’s comments about my young daughter (and I doubt he’d ever dare make such comments about anyone else’s daughter): ‘Laughter incited by sexually-perverted comments made by a 62-year-old male celebrity aimed at a 14-year-old girl is not only disgusting, but it reminds us some Hollywood/NY entertainers have a long way to go in understanding what the rest of America understands – that acceptance of inappropriate sexual comments about an underage girl, who could be anyone’s daughter, contributes to the atrociously high rate of sexual exploitation of minors by older men who use and abuse others.’”-Sarah Palin

Letterman responded by apologizing (kinda). He said that he wasn’t talking about her 14 year old but her 18 year old. You know, the one who got knocked up when she was 17 while  her mom was running for VP last year? Yeah, that one.  He replied

“These are not jokes made about her 14-year-old daughter. I would never, never make jokes about raping or having sex of any description with a 14-year-old girl. Am I guilty of poor taste? Yes. Did I suggest that it was OK for her 14-year-old daughter to be having promiscuous sex? No.”

He cleared the air and then invited Gov. Palin to be a guest on his show. Yeah, she’ll definately take that offer up.

But whether you like it or not, Sarah Palin is back in the spotlight. But even if you don’t like her, she sure as hell is entertaining. I think James Carville said it best: “She doesn’t always just sit on the edge of the cliff, she actually falls off it sometimes”.

I have a little advice for Gov. Palin: Lighten up. Yes, these are nasty, but if you really are back for good, then you’re going to be dealing with a lot more of these. Letterman will probably be the worst of your problems.

-Lesley

Today, the World Health Organization (WHO) declared swine flu (or H1N1) to be the worst outbreak of disease in over 41 years. Previously, the H1N1 virus was classifed by WHO at pandemic phase 5, meaning that although outbreaks were occuring in localized areas, it had not infected as many people world-wide. Now, as a phase 6, (gasp!) it has currently infected 28,774 suckers people as a global epidemic. Drug giant GlaxoSmithKline PLC announced that they would start mass-producing anti-pig-virus-O’-death vaccines, but it’ll take nearly forevs (or several months) before they are ready for widespread distribution.

Now back up.

Only 144 deaths have been reported. That’s a mortality rate of 0.5%. The seasonal flu has a mortality rate between 5% and 10%.

When it reached its phase 5 status a couple months ago, the media went crazy, constantly bombarding news stations with stories on how swine flu = instant death. So, if I were you, I’d throw out the TV now.

Or, if you’d rather watch the madness ensue, you can follow the CDC on Twitter!

-Zack

This week, Idol runner-up Adam Lambert came out on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine. Wait, Adam, you mean the eyeliner, nail polish, make up, winged costumes, and falsetto singing were signs of your sexuality? Suprise! Guess you caught us off gaurd with that one - not. “Glambert” reportedly held out on informing the media of his sexuality because he feared it would influence the show’s voters, and could cost him the competition. Nonetheless, after securing second place, he still managed to secure a record deal with producer 19 Recordings. With career and image intact, Lambert moved on, despite that pesky picture of him making out with a guy that was leaked out through the internet (see here).

-Zack

Hailing to you from the hot, humid, and pimpin’ city of Atlanta, we are Zack and Lesley! Our goal is to entertain you with the craziest, most random happenstances we can find (as well as poke fun at high-profile figures) while oozing satire, sarcasm, and snarky remarks.